A couple months ago I went to a ropes course with our daughter and her Scout troop. We climbed around in the trees, exploring different obstacles and doing some zip lining.

Here’s the thing: I’m not actually that fond of heights

But I wanted to do this activity with our daughter and I wanted to stretch out of my comfort zone.

While we were on the ropes course our safety harnesses were always connected securely to the guide lines. As we traversed each obstacle we had two points of attachment. When we moved from one guide line to another, we could only undo one of those points of attachment at a time. We were always securely connected to the guide lines and it was impossible to fall.

As a result, I felt safe, even on that one slightly (ok, more than slightly) scary obstacle that creaked and swayed ominously as I reached the middle. I knew that even if something happened while I was on that obstacle, my safety harness would catch me and I wouldn’t fall.

Our daughter had been a bit nervous at the beginning as well, but we both got out of our comfort zones and had a good time. Which is not something to be discounted, as anyone with teens knows 🙂

While we were climbing around, I realized that it wasn’t heights I was scared of

I was fine climbing around in the trees and zip lining out of them. I had a blast doing all that because I was in my safety harness.

What I am afraid of is falling and hitting the ground

If I’m at the top of a cliff, gingerly peering over, I won’t be thrilled. Not because of the height, but because of the danger of falling. There’s no safety harness tethering me to a guide line. Just the thought of what could happen makes me feel nervous and apprehensive.

But in reality, how often does the worst happen? Yes, I’ve tripped and fallen while hiking and broken my foot, but in the grand scheme of things, it was not a severe injury. I still go hiking (and have even started trail running) despite breaking my foot while hiking. If I allowed fear to rule my life, I’d never do anything or go anywhere. My life would be a lot more mundane and devoid of adventure.

How often do you allow fear to hold you back from doing something?

I could have stayed on the ground and just watched the Scouts on the ropes course. I could even have stayed home and not gone at all. But because I went and faced my fears, I learned more about myself and spent some quality time with our daughter. I also set an example for my daughter so that she was willing to face her fears.

• Have you faced a fear, only to realize it was a non-issue?
• Have you faced that fear, only to realize you were afraid of something else entirely?
• Or have you just been avoiding those things you are afraid of?

As we start a new year and think about resolutions, don’t make the same New Year’s resolutions you make every year, just to crash and burn in a week. Make a meaningful resolution to face a fear and conquer it. I’ll be doing this too. For me, that means I’ll be trying out bouldering at a local climbing gym with our 6 year old who loves American Ninja Warrior, but isn’t fond of heights either.

Face your fears

1. Pick one thing that you’ve always wanted to do, but been afraid to try.

• hiking
• kayaking
• rving
• towing
• solo rving
• something else not on this list

2. What about it makes you afraid?

Try to figure out why it’s an issue for you.

Is it because you’ve never tried it (fear of the unknown)? Are you afraid of getting hurt or in an accident? Try to identify what it is so you can address it head on.

3. What can you do to mitigate those fears?

Just as the safety harness mitigated my fear of heights and helped me realize what my issue really is, is there something you can do? Can you bring a friend, make a contingency plan, somehow push yourself to give it a try despite your fears? Perhaps start small and work up to what you’re afraid of?

4. Give it a try!

You’ve identified what you want to do and why it scares you. You’ve also figured out what you can do to make it less scary. Now go try it out in a setting that is as stress-free as possible.

The first time I took the kids kayaking, I went when I knew friends would be nearby. This gave me the peace of mind that if something went wrong or I got too overwhelmed, they’d be on hand to help.

Don’t make your first RV trip ever be one that takes you across the country with a short time line. That will not afford you the leeway you’ll need to get comfortable and feel good about the experience. Drive to the gas station, or the local Wal-Mart, or a nearby campground. Get a feel for how it handles, practice parking and backing up, then embark on longer trips.

5. Share your experience

Regardless of how your experience goes, share it! Even if it’s not the experience you hoped for, be real about the experience you did have. I spent an hour and a half trying to backup our travel trailer when we first got it. It was stressful and I was hopping out every thirty seconds to check my progress (or lack thereof), but eventually I got it parked properly. I learned a lot from that experience and was always able to backup the trailer without any problems whenever needed. And now I can laugh about what a hot mess I was at the time 🙂

I’d love to hear about your experiences: tag me on Instagram with the #OurAdventuringFamily, or share your experience on my Facebook page (@OurAdventuringFamily).

6. Support others

Follow the hashtag #OurAdventuringFamily and my Facebook page and cheer others on as they face their fears.

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Some would say that you’re not losing anything by not trying new things. But reframe it and consider what you will gain by facing your fears. If you’ve always wanted to road trip across the country but been afraid to give it a go, think about the experiences you’re missing out on. If you secretly want to embark on a multi-day hiking trip or start a business, this is your year! Stay tuned for future posts that will help you with the logistics of making your dreams come true.

What fear will you conquer in 2020?